rooted, does the maple yearn
not to mourn
the whirling seeds
and red-crushed leaves
it scatters and seeks to follow?
each tree,
trunk strong,
branches long,
leaves broad
carpets (on) the box around it,
and, overflowing, the sidewalks too
until someone or some machine
sweeps, rakes,
or sucks up its sorrow --
do you think the tree knows
that what it's lost will return?
that in the season after next
it will be reborn?
or do you think, in the cold,
it mourns?
i don't remember where she came from,
June,
but i met her after May.
.
she was the sixth month,
the middle month, you see, and
the final month in the year that mattered
that, when we were kids,
never had a beginning or an end,
or a middle which we liked;
we all had disavowed it (as kids often do),
those early few days of June,
where excitement was the month before and
"you were there, at the end of school;
that's where you come from,
June, the beginning" (that she hated so much)
at this she would laugh sideways with us,
saying, "well, i wish i had waited,
and given that to May, and maybe had come first,
and lost those la
see ourself as inspiration
ourself: not us or each other or plural
ourself. combined -- leaving nothing out
except the v-e-s
which isn't really necessary
more of a sort of tribulation;
a trial designed to separate
the fibers -- to pull them apart
pull those fibers of our heart,
unraveling them like the sweater you wore of
(we both wore it, really)
loosely woven yarn -- i could see your nipples;
you weren't wearing a bra and i
digress; it's a trial.
we don't need them;
we're not plural.
in fact, next time you talk about me,
say: i love myself.
i love the way i feel
i love the way i groan
and contort --
and oh goddamn i
rooted, does the maple yearn
not to mourn
the whirling seeds
and red-crushed leaves
it scatters and seeks to follow?
each tree,
trunk strong,
branches long,
leaves broad
carpets (on) the box around it,
and, overflowing, the sidewalks too
until someone or some machine
sweeps, rakes,
or sucks up its sorrow --
do you think the tree knows
that what it's lost will return?
that in the season after next
it will be reborn?
or do you think, in the cold,
it mourns?
i don't remember where she came from,
June,
but i met her after May.
.
she was the sixth month,
the middle month, you see, and
the final month in the year that mattered
that, when we were kids,
never had a beginning or an end,
or a middle which we liked;
we all had disavowed it (as kids often do),
those early few days of June,
where excitement was the month before and
"you were there, at the end of school;
that's where you come from,
June, the beginning" (that she hated so much)
at this she would laugh sideways with us,
saying, "well, i wish i had waited,
and given that to May, and maybe had come first,
and lost those la
We were thirty-eight at seventeen
Here,
We live from cigarette to cigarette.
Elsewhere,
Some of us are fighting wars.
Some of us are jarring bells.
Some of us are collecting shells.
The rest of us are sleeping,
dreaming about everything.
We would get up,
We would cry help
But our pillows are scented
With bedspreads of one-million-thread-count Egyptian cotton.
My God
We are almost rotten.
It's so hard to see the top from the bottom.
We could cry help.
We would get up.
But we are already forty-something.
and I think we've forgotten.
I took a bus ride behind a thick-coated Man.
I saw him get up and I saw him get on
And so I followed him instead of following my overstated footsteps, still fresh from yesterday and yesterdays yester.
Let me tell you, he smelt like
old uniforms left in thinly lit closets, unforgotten
And cotton.
There was something about his
His
His silent mouth, corners turned no-ward.
Let me tell you
There were words between his wrinkles.
I took a bus ride.
Behind a sad-browed man.
I saw him sit down and I saw him get uncomfortable.
Let me tell you, he smelt like
Intoxicating jasmine and peasants with purple dresses hidden in their a
O Lilith fair, the counter-blind
Does charm her midnight wicker-man
With dawn-bright kiss, the tie-and-bind:
He smoulders bright, that flicker-man.
She comes, the bright white Lilith-day
With gold and jewels and fun'ral pyre
To wash your whiskey-tears away
And cleanse each child-crown with her fire.
Dear Mother,
Your thoughts were just misspelled.
I am not loose.
I am lose.
Knowing this,
There is not a word or world which could tear me apart now.
(all I need are my own two hands.)
There is an anus on my forehead
Resting right in the center.
It is my least appealing feature.
Though I make it sound merely unpleasant,
I actually loathe the goddamned thing
Just for even existing.
I wipe my face after I flush, and
I puke my guts out
When my stool is loose.
But I guess I should be thankful
That one day, I will die.
This seemed like an appropriate place to share these thoughts. I haven't been active here for several years, but I built some important friendships here with some outstanding community members. They all were critical to me, helping me through trying times and bringing some smiling relief and respite to me as I stayed up very late talking with very great people. Times changed, and while they've sometimes been trying in different ways, I haven't kept in touch with many of the people I knew here. I sometimes regret this but life is bittersweet and changes.
I did keep in touch with a few and occasionally checked in with others. :devMelancholyDay